Transcript
WEBVTT
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The most difficult day of my life was on this day, november 19th 2023.
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Exactly one year ago, 365 days ago, I had to say goodbye to my hero, my old man, my dad.
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6,205 days ago, on November 19th that's 17 years ago my wife lost her hero and role model, the woman who raised her, her grandmother.
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Today, we come together and try to understand all that has happened between November 19th.
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Let me tell you something.
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Everybody struggles.
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The difference is some people choose to go through it and some choose to grow through it.
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The choice is completely yours.
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Which one you choose will have a very profound effect on the way you live your life.
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If you find strength in the struggle, then this podcast is for you.
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Do you have a relationship that is comfortable with uncomfortable conversations?
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Uncomfortable conversations challenge you, humble you and they build you.
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When you sprinkle a little time and distance on it, it all makes sense.
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Most disagreements they stem from our own insecurities.
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You are right where you need to be Back on time.
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We can find the truth the whole day gone we'll be right.
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Way too fast and way too fast.
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Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
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What it do, what it hot, dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-doo.
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You sounded like a chickadee, chickadee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee.
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That's our state bird, you know.
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That is our state bird and I'm proud of you.
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Actually, what happened is I think I glitched.
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Happened is I think I glitched.
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I I like I hung up there and I'm feeling a little bit dehydrated and I think my tongue got stuck to the roof of my mouth and I just couldn't couldn't get it all out.
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Well, it sounded magnificent you look like you're wearing lieutenant dan's sweatshirt listen, don't let me say lieutenant dan, because look, you have one arm.
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What is going on over there?
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my sweater's ripped, but it's too cozy to throw it away.
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Everybody has that good, cozy sweater that you just can't throw away.
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Well, my whole entire shoulder is ripped, from my shoulder to my elbow, and I refuse to let it go.
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I need to learn how to sew.
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That good cozy sweatshirt of yours or sweater of yours I've never seen before in my life.
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So don't you even worry about it.
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It's cozy.
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I think it's a family heirloom of sorts.
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Just putting that out there, hot diggity.
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Damn, am I so excited to be joined again by you.
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It it's been a few weeks, babe, been a few weeks.
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You're back to work so.
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I am back to work yep, it's been a few weeks.
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I've been flying, flying solo over here on the show, really big show.
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Now you have the baby.
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It's a huge show, huge.
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Really huge.
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You got huge things coming, big, huge things.
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Episode 228.
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That's pretty huge, that is huge, that is really huge and today's going to be a very blessed show.
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Oh.
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God, we're going to talk about how blessed we are.
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You're going to be sick of being blessed.
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You're going to be so blessed.
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You're going to be tired of being blessed man Looking forward to making Christmas great again this year.
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I'm just going to be tired of being blessed man, looking forward to making Christmas great again this year.
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I'm just going to put that out there, dude.
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Episode 228.
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Hope you all are feeling great.
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228 means that it's 228 consecutive weeks of Share the Circle podcast.
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Some weeks are easier than others, some weeks are just a little more difficult to record.
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Here we are again kind of up against the deadline, the date line, and I think the biggest reason for being up against that is number one we've been a little busy.
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But number two today's a day that I didn't really know how it was going to go.
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I didn't know what was going to happen, how I was going to feel, what to plan for, and I've always claimed that Share the Struggle podcast is a real, raw time response to life.
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Right, did I say that correctly?
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I don't think I did.
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It's a real, raw, raw, real time.
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That's what it is.
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That's how I say it.
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Am I intoxicated?
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I did have the biggest margarita of my life with my mom at dinner.
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Yeah, you did.
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It is a raw real time response to life.
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Yeah.
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That's what it is.
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Why am I so stupid?
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It's the tequila.
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God, I'm an idiot.
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I did also get into the moonshine and I had a bush peach when I was sitting on my dad's tailgate admiring the field and staring at the horse.
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I saw the bush out there.
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Bush peach, you were looking at my bush.
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You're welcome for finding that for you by the way.
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Don't just slip over the fact that you were staring at my bush and you just admitted to it on the recording.
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You just told the people you have a bush.
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That alone is a problem.
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Amen, sister.
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They don't know what I do with my bush.
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How I keep it prim and prappy Anyways it's a happy little bush.
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It's a really happy little bush.
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Moving on.
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We're not going to talk about your babushka, that's about your babushka.
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That's about it.
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That's about it.
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I'm going to scare the people away yes, we've already done that.
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I didn't really know how today was going to go and I really thought that when I looked at the calendar, when I realized that November 19th just happened to be a Tuesday and we generally record our podcast on a Tuesday and get things edited up and posted up and ready to rock and roll for y'all to win another Wednesday.
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You little winners.
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For all my winners out there, you happy little winners, don't be confused by winners and winters.
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They're different.
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There's a T in winter.
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Okay, anyways, I've lost it.
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Squirrel.
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I was saying something, and what I was saying is I love you.
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I love you too, sugar.
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But what I was trying to tell the people is, I realized that November 19th is a very important day, a landmark day for us, and it's one of those things where you get closer to it and you just tell yourself it's just going to be another day, that's it, it's just a day, I'm going to be over it.
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But then there's times during that day when it just kind of hits you.
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You just wake up different and emotions come out of nowhere.
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And for those of you that are listening for the first time, if you're not a day one, if you haven't been along for this journey of share the struggle, then you have no flipping clue what I'm talking about and I apologize to you.
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I should have explained myself better as we started the show, and I apologize to you.
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I should have explained myself better as we started the show, but November 19th 2023, at 744 am, I said goodbye to my father, to my hero, and this happens to mark 365 days.
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Today is the anniversary of my dad's passing and I think the encouraging thing about this is to think that there's a lot of things that you do for the first time, and those things that you do for the first time, I feel like they hurt that much more.
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You know, like the first Thanksgiving, the first Christmas, the first birthday, the first just all of those things, those like special moments and days and holidays.
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The first time you do those things, the first time you keep a tradition going, the first time you go to hunting camp without your dad, without your family member, your lifeline, your hero, the first time you do some of those things, I feel like it stings more.
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So today becomes one of the last first-time things that I'm going to do.
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Right, when you think about the things that me and him have always done together, today kind of marks like the end of doing those first time things without him For the most part, you know, like all those things that are on the calendar, those traditions and things that we do.
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Getting that behind me, as much as it sounds silly, kind of feels like an achievement.
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You know what I mean.
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Right.
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I get a fucking badge of courage today.
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You know, mm-hmm, I get a fucking badge of courage today.
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You know, mm-hmm.
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I shouldn't have swore I was early.
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You are early Lamb it on the tequila Lord.
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I apologize.
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Take care of the pygmy goats in Tennessee.
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Yeah, that's right.
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Who said that?
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Larry the Cable Guy, larry the Cable Guy.
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He didn't say anything about the picnic goats.
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I think you made that.
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I made that up, but it was hilarious.
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So I think that um realizing that from here on out, every time I do something, I'm gonna be like looking back at it and saying this is my second, this is my fourth, my sixth time doing this.
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You know, I feel like some of the first or some of the hardest, and um getting through those.
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You have to give yourself some credit and give yourself some grace for getting through those things.
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Mm-hmm.
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For you.
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You've been getting through those things for 17 years now.
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Yep yep, as we talk on the podcast and we've been doing this since 2020, july of uh 2020 if you've been listening along, you've heard different episodes, and if you've been listening that long, then you know our story and you realize that there's so many random, strange things that keep us connected.
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There's so many like common things that we have that they don't always make sense and sometimes they don't connect for 10 years.
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You know what I mean.
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Right.
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But the fact that you lost your grandmother on the exact same calendar date that I lost my dad and to people that don't know, your grandmother was basically your mother, so you lost that parental figure, you know, same day Pretty crazy.
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Yeah, and later on we found out for the same reason when we talked to Nana.
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That's true too.
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I didn't even think about that part of it.
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Yep, so here we are together November 19th, 2024 is when we're recording this and I think when people reach out or they, you know, check in and see how things are going and they kind of ask you like, what did you do today?
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And today I wanted to do things that my dad would have done and I wanted to do things that like dad would have done, and I wanted to do things that me and him would have done.
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So that's kind of what I stuck to for the day.
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It didn't quite go the way I wanted it to go, because I spent all damn day trying to accomplish one task and in the meantime I broke a bunch of stuff, probably scratched up my tractor and probably almost decapitated myself yeah, it's because you're just like your dad and you do not like to ask for help I don't like getting help but sometimes you have to the flagpole.
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You've been trying to put up mental help.
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What's that?
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the flagpole you've been trying to put up is over 20 feet tall, for god's sakes, and you're trying to stand it up with a tractor.
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That's what?
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10 feet tall the flagpole is.
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I measured it today.
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It's like maybe about 28 feet, a 28 foot flagpole, that that my dad put up when I was a kid.
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I don't remember how old I, but I remember my dad putting this flagpole up and it was just this obnoxious, majestic thing.
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Right, my dad owned a steel company, a welding company, and he just made this 28-foot flagpole at our house.
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This is a flagpole that would be big enough to see at like a car dealership, you know what I mean, and we had it on our front yard.
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Now it's in my horse field.
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Now it's in the horse pen yeah, horse field.
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So we used to fly big old American flags off of it and I got to say this brings up a ridiculous story.
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But there was a time I don't know if I you know, statute of limitations have passed, so I can't be arrested for this and I must confess that I was a jackass when I was in high school.
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You went to a different high school for a short amount of time, correct, just senior year.
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Remember all the flags that used to be up, like in the cafeterias and like the gyms.
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There was like a flag for every country all over the high school I think it was maybe the cafeteria or something.
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We used to take the flags down and we started this thing.
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I don't want to get too far off subject here, but it was back in the day of wrestling, when the NWO was really big and.
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New World Order.
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We took a couple of flags and we took spray paint and we painted SWO over other nations' flags and the SWO was the senior world order.
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Okay, jesus Christ, but we used our strengths for good, our evil powers were used for good.
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And I'll just say this, I'll just give you this story in case I've never told this story on here before.
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I don't think I've ever heard this story.
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All right this one's for you then.
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Nothing to do with my dad.
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So we were in high school.
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I was a senior obviously that's the senior world order and I don't remember what the class was that I had but we had this substitute and the sub became like a long-term sub.
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The teacher we had must have been out for surgery or something, I don't remember the situation, but we ended up having this sub that became like long-term and then like almost permanent.
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So we had them for months.
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Right, it was this older guy and he had some health problems.
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I don't want to get too far off from reality here, but it's like it's.
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I mean, we're talking 24 years ago now, right, but he had, he had cancer and he was, you know, there was.
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He had good days and bad where he was just sick, right, and he was just having a tough time and I can't remember there was.
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I don't remember if he had a wheelchair or an eye patch or something.
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I can't remember.
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I'm literally sounding like a total jackass, okay, but what I'm pointing out here is that he was battling and he would have some, he had tough days, but he was a phenomenal guy like I loved him.
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We had a connection and, um, I was a jackass that didn't try really hard in school and I was sitting up on the uh windowsill just leaning against the windows, looking out doors and not paying attention.
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And uh, this is one day in class where he was like all right, guys, well, everybody, uh, take your seats.
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We, we're going to take a test.
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And I'm just sitting there looking out the window and he's like Keith, you got to take a chair.
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Man, like we're going to take it.
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No, no, no test today.
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He's like bud, you got to sit down.
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Man, here we go.
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It's like coaching a little league here we go.
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Pal, sit down, we're gonna take your test.
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And I was like, uh, no test today.
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Cinnamon toast crunch today.
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It's like what do you what?
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do you mean what?
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I was like cereal, we're gonna have cereal today.
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He's like I don't know what the hell cereal has to do with this in the class and I was like teach, I'm just gonna be honest with you, I'm a little hungry right now.
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I think it's enough of us that are here that are hungry.
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You look tired.
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You're probably hungry.
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These tests are overrated.
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You give me a hall pass.
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I'm gonna go down the street, I'm gonna get milk and cereal and we're all gonna have breakfast.
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And he's like that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard.
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Get, sit down and take your test.
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Five minutes later I'm still on the windowsill and I was like we're having cereal.
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And he says come over here and get this damn pass.
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And he wrote a pass and I went down to like Jakey's Market and we bought milk and cereal and like the whole class had cereal and we just shot the shit the entire time.
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There was no test.
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Jesus.
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But I say all this to set up the fact that this teacher was awesome.
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He was a great guy and there was some younger classmen, like freshman, sophomore class, that were picking on him and we started to take note to the fact that they were picking on this teacher and it was really bothering him, it was upsetting him.
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And then you kind of heard rumors of these kids and what they were saying and what they were doing, and I could physically see that it was bothering him, right.
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So one day I went to him and the class that was making fun of him, that was giving him a hard time, was right after lunch and I said I want you to do me a favor today.
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And he said what do you, you to do me a favor today?
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And uh, he's like what do you?
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What do you mean, do me a favor?
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And I said I'm going to need you to be 15 minutes late from lunch.
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And uh, he said why?
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What do you mean 15 minutes late from lunch?
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I said I just need your classroom for the first 15 minutes of that next class and uh, he was like I don't know anything about this and I'm like you don't know nothing about it, but you just happen to be late coming back from the cafeteria and he said all right, and he walked off on that day at lunch.
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After lunch, all the kids went into their class and there was me and, like four of my buddies I remember Steve Clancy's son, chris, being one of them and we took one of these nation's flags.
00:18:07.503 --> 00:18:12.739
I spray painted swo over and we, we taped it to the chalkboard in the classroom.
00:18:12.739 --> 00:18:17.273
Before the kids went in there they just said swo and black spray paint.
00:18:17.314 --> 00:18:28.491
Imagine the nwo days, right, and this is taped to the classroom chalkboard and all these kids are filing in and they just see this taped up on the wall and swo written on the chalkboard.
00:18:28.491 --> 00:18:45.247
I had some cryptic undertaker speech written on the chalkboard and we're out like in the hallway, kind of, you know, out of out of view, and we let all the kids kind of mingled in and they all come in laughing and joking and they all start to get quiet and you let them sit there for about five minutes.
00:18:45.247 --> 00:18:52.307
There's no teacher, there's no nothing and the door is shut and then, all of a sudden, I blow the door open oh my gosh.
00:18:52.547 --> 00:19:04.955
And we come in as a whole crew and clancy's in the background coming in with the nwo and I walked in that classroom and the first desk I see I just flipped it over my head and lost my fucking shit.
00:19:04.955 --> 00:19:07.103
I started throwing things at the chalkboard.
00:19:07.103 --> 00:19:08.465
We closed the door.
00:19:08.465 --> 00:19:26.584
One of my friends held the door shut and the window closed and I just went off and I said you little motherfuckers, if I ever hear any word out of, if I hear anything come out of this room, if if this teacher comes to me and says anything, I will come back here and murder every single one of you.
00:19:26.584 --> 00:19:29.452
And I just started throwing things around.
00:19:29.513 --> 00:19:32.102
I picked kids up stuffed into chalkboards.
00:19:32.102 --> 00:19:42.192
There was people hiding under their desk and we just went off and I said if you ever, if you ever mess with him again, I will beat the living shit out of you.
00:19:42.192 --> 00:19:44.801
This is a total random story.
00:19:44.801 --> 00:19:50.628
I don't know where all this came from, but this is what high school was like in my day, which this comes back to the pussification of America.
00:19:50.628 --> 00:19:58.411
If there was still bullying in high school, we wouldn't be growing these mushes of children who are growing right now.
